Wednesday, February 24, 2010


Page A3 hosts the next installment in the Herald's series on 'Shit That Happened To Animals'. It's not a dog - sorry 'Rusty' - but, if anything, it's even cuter!

A man will appear in court today charged with animal cruelty after apparently using a lop-eared rabbit to threaten passersby on Auckland's Queen St.

Police say the 53-year-old stole the bunny - which the SPCA has subsequently named Larry - and swung it by its ears at pedestrians, while verbally abusing them.

[...] When officers arrived, the man allegedly tried to hide the rabbit under his shirt. Police had to wrestle the rabbit from him, and the security guard held it as the man was handcuffed.

More details! What colour was the shirt? What wrestling techniques were used? Greco-Roman? How did the guard hold the rabb... er, Larry?
The man then allegedly spat at police.
Oh, who cares about the person involved.
* Anyone with information about the rabbit should call the Auckland downtown police station on 09 379 4500 or Vicki Border at the SPCA on 09 256 7300 x867.
Yes, I'm sure that this is exactly what the police need to be dealing with - animal-crazed lunatics ringing them up with unsubstantiated rumours concerning missing pet rabbits.

Anyway, the good news is that the rabbit seems to be all right.

SPCA inspector Vicki Border said the rabbit was checked by a veterinarian at Mangere headquarters, but appeared to have escaped uninjured.

"He was in a very stressful state. It's very remarkable he's in one piece considering what happened."

Excellent. Now where's my bacon and eggs?


  1. Why is that woman sticking her tongue in Larry's ear? Honestly I sometimes wonder about the SPCA!

    Perhaps there's a story there...

  2. If there was, it would be the only story anywhere near this 'event'.

  3. Jesus, assault with a deadly wabbit. A very worrying development, clearly. It used to be that nutters in the street either muttered "buggrit, millennium hand and shrimp" or simply asked for "10p feracuppatea, guv?" Now they're throwing rodents in our faces. Can't something be done about these mad rabbit-robbers stalking our streets?

  4. Yes, it's all quite "hare" raising.

    With apologies to countless Warner Brothers cartoons, there.

  5. If they can't find a home for Larry, here's a recipe:

  6. Speaking of Warner Bros cartoons, it's is lucky for Larry that its duck season at the moment...

    Or is it rabbit season?

  7. Should menacing people with rabbits be a three strikes offence?